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poetry + prose = power  Feminist Poem - 4/04 Strumming a chord a ring of discord sends the houseguests scattering under the floorboards The men are flicking their tongues like whips reminding the womyn of domestic responsibility drawing near with their lips and far as far as tranquility goes- The televevison set the vcr thats the only windows there are and i suffocate obliviate the sense inside- Love doesn't come easy it isn't a game so next time you drop in i'll try not to complain about how much you pissed things up next time you should just try to pee in a cup cuz everyone's doing it some have reasons why we should be in school instead we're getting high... FREEDOM's a word whose meaning is hard to convey it could be freedom from him or from her or from they but you never really know unless you've been in the trend and thought maybe just maybe i'll get them to bend Current mood:  artistic.Current music: "Rock Paper Scissors" - Ani Difranco. i guess what it boils down to now is who breaks first (you - because of me, and you) (me - because of you, me and her) and i wish it could be you but it looks like i'm going to have to. for the sake of sanity, comradery, and more pain. Love isn't part of it and i wish i knew what was we skirt the issue until i'm on the floor your knees up between my legs my skirt high and uneffective the only thing i'd say is that there can't just be one way i wish i knew if my theory of diversity was true but even truth is an illusion and it's not emo it's not angst it's thoughts strung together in a chain that just broke the glass window of growing up not questioning if even that was something someone made up so you fill your arms with more scars and add more lines to the should-be-art work head heavy under drugged circumstances crawl home so sober you're classified intoxicated and even the wind screams through your hair and fingers in silence until you're so bereaft of touch it makes you sick - standing in a canned food aisle i looked at the stewed tomatoes and felt a pin prick above my sternum and my whole world drained out suddenly empty and disconnected and unwired misfired with that round of applause and clay bullets shooting at shotgun pigeons losing to handgun ducks. it doesn't relate it doesnt connect it doesn't make sense it just happens - saying goodbye to him because of telling me there's got to be someone more (isn't it always like that?) for me but i just want the security without the need to impress and feel jealous. i wish it would happen without the wine and ativan and dreams done overwell cooked until the truth was gone. i'm at the point when the least amount of tension heightened slightly for only a second scares the shit outta me. Current mood:  awake.Current music: "Shy" - Ani Difranco. Don't do it. Please don't delete me from your side as if i never existed in your eyes your dark brown hypnotizing eyes and your beautiful sleeping frame from cheekbone to thigh- Don't erase me as if i'd never kissed your mouth your ear your neck, chest, and hipbones don't jar me with your metaphysical steel toes- I'm still here i still exist i still love- You don't remember, do you? I'm back to before i met you hereafter i begged you i left you to decide because you felt i lied and, i did, but i didn't mean to-like when you said that mean thing and rushed back in to hug me from behind and beg me to forgive which i did so many times, babe. But, you deserve better More beautiful and motivated and even though it hurts, i hope she doesn't cause you half as much pain as i gave you. Let the rain wash the blame away you wonderful lover - thank you for the world while we had it. All the suffering and especially all of the Nirvana. Hopefully someday you'll forgive me and we can still be friends. (I love you) *it doesn't hold the magnitude* and i must reflect on when we made love, tackled and kissed hard clothing slipped off skin against skin and tongues tracking unmentionables pressed together and a shudder of eroticism as my body craved you and your fingers were everywhere and i wanted you forever... i wanted your lips everywhere your body part of mine your taste kept always and your face within reach. i traced your jawline contours memorizing it to devour later, alone. waking up next to you was the best because i knew i had someone that loved every part of me every inch of imperfection and saw love when i came home to your arms and felt "ok"... i don't know why i broke your trust i don't understand how i broke our hearts, but it happened and you cut me off, alone on your porch in the rain - waiting for the reconciliation that never came. i still ache for you but i make it disappear because you have every right to move on. Go get'em, rock star. Current mood:  accomplished.Current music: "Virtue" - Ani Difranco. i didn't know the pizza was yours, ma'am... but if it was any consolation i enjoyed it. And, forgive me for my hesitation, But i'm not sorry. i hold that no one should be sorry for being hungry hungry hungry because of sacrifice to tiny plump fingers clutching to skirts and breadcrusts on a dirty street hungry because of dark closet corners all too familiar hungry because i had tasted poetry. Poetry that had melted from angst and selfish loveand shifted to the greater things demons and nymphs (how cliche) gathering under the boughs of every facade and color of humanity on stage-dreams pulsing out from under the floorboards pulsing so high so strong you can taste it dripping from your tongue and sailing up through the ceiling and soar left alone in the great wide expanse of the empty dumpster searching for something more / night silence shattered by sirens and screams heads lift high senses snap / am i the only one who can't write a fucking poem? Because the wails are echoing off the chambers of my suddenly finite mind Dissected slowly by daggers flying friendly from my own kind The kind that pastes the loving pisces on the back of their minivan and passes the tired girls thumbing their way home from the monotony of mortality, Becasue only creeps don't drive cars Only creeps pick up girls with tattered homemade wings waving at the stars hidden behind a cyan curtain / Waving at the cyan curtain dropped to paint the night sky over a sad cracked sidewalk of a street where three little boys pause and lift their chins to connect to their darl existance. No--no, not "dark"..because you forget, darkness isn't inferior, it isn't sinfully cunning filled with criminals and backbiters whispering about streetfighters fighting the fight of drugs and revenge - i'll give you a fight to fight, mr president. i present hunger, i present homocide, i present rape, theft, and hate (god i hate those bike theives) it's poverty it's terrorism it's the terror of hunger, homicide, rape, and hate and lines drawn across the sky at dawn 100,000 miles from where the fight really is. or, where it should be. What do you mean we belong over there? What do you mean America is doing the right thing using fear- cold and stainless steel pressed against our heads silence screaming at our words and so much left unsaid because no one wanted to hear her, his, their story... Now thats sick, as in, like, disgusting. Current music: "Grand Canyon" - Ani Difranco. Generally, People don't like change. Change is a struggle to realign and readjust. And generally, people don't like to struggle. Struggling is too often seemingly futile. And generally, people don't like feeling futile. Futility is a rut that requires change. People just need to stop doing the same things over and expecting different results. Generally, that just doesn't work. And when green hits head on with purple And blue provokes orange to the point of breaking Someone needs to stand up and help shift the paradigm. And eventually you'll find that you have to drag yourself out of the feather down blanket And speak about it. Though what may seem more difficult You have to listen. Because even though strife gives us all a parallel experience We're all still minorities (And separation will only bury the truth) It shouldn't have to be one big melting pot Where we all get together and emerge happy and whole Forgetting that unity is more of a puzzle you struggle to fit together as individuals working - a culmination of souls striving on the only constant, which is change. It's entirely too unfortunate that, generally, people don't like change. Just remember: change is easier once you start to learn. It's a good thing a few people like learning. Current music: "Lost Woman Song" - Ani Difranco. |
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